My heart was recently crushed, and with very little experience with this within the past couple of years, I reacted and did ALL the things they say you shouldn’t . . . bought a new car, searched for a new job, signed up to run a marathon, traveled out of state to testify against my ex-husband (k, so maybe that one isn’t typical but not sure I would have done it otherwise), I even considered moving out of state! I avoided 'that' restaurant, and 'that' park, and turn the radio off when 'that' lame song came on . . . Basically, I did anything and everything to stay distracted and keep my mind off the culprit.
So a couple of nights ago the kids and I were driving home from visiting with friends and Aubrey started to tell me about her day via Pig Latin. Her teacher this year uses it a lot in class and thus Aubrey comes home and often tries to teach us. I guess Cayden was feeling left out so he proceeded to tell me about his day by spelling each and EVERY word . . . So I am sitting in the front seat, trying to decipher what the heck my kids are saying iha M-O-T-H-E-R M-Y yma T-E-T-C-H-R ommya . . . between Caydens recent Irish accent he picked up, his new spelling abilities, and Aubrey's creative twist on pig latin, I was at a total loss and decided my best immediate option would be to crank up the Hannah Montana cd full blast and get my kids to sing instead of talk! This plan went over well and I proudly cracked up in the front seat!
For the remainder of the car ride I couldn’t help but think about my life and my progress, and at that moment, I realized my heart was healed! For months I was sad and pondered on all that gunk way too much. I never thought I would get past that horrible ache and like they say, know I am so much stronger for it. All those "typical" things I did have turned to be a blessing in my life . . . I lOVE LOVE LOVE my new car, I recently got hired at the very BEST school in town, my knew best friends are a result of that failed relationship, my ex husband was reamed in court (for those who don’t know him, it totally serves him right), and I have run my brains out in the past months and am SO ready to run my marathon! My feet may look like hell, but my heart is completely healed!! I love my kids and our crazy life, even if it's just the three of us!!
3 comments:
Bonnie - so cute! I love it! I knew you would be great at this whole blogging thing! I'm so happy you are happy - you deserve nothing but the best! love you guys!
Bonnie! I love your new blog! I am sure people will love reading about your life because it is already so entertaining! Have a super day!
This blog entry made me cry...Don't ever give up, Bonnie. Honestly, my kids and my grandkids mean everything to me. I love Terry and I don't suppose I have him in the right order on my list of most important people in my life and according to church doctrine nothing is supposed to be more important to me than him- but gosh, guys are so retarded and don't know how to treat women (for the most part...I have met a few guys that are confident enough to trust a woman enough to treat her like a queen and you know what, for the most part, those women treat their husbands like he is an awesome king- men are just dumb when it comes to women)...but back to my priority list...my kids and my grandkids make me know that I matter and that I am loved. Their love seems so much less conditional. Most men place so many conditions on their love that women always just have to run on faith that their husband does love them...like it is some sort of test that we cannot possibly pass. Men could have such a better life and way less cranky women if they would just be more grateful and say the nice little things we want to hear. Bonnie, know that the majority of the men in the world are this way and the only way most of them make it into heaven is by the mercy of their wives. I may not know any other gospel principle to be as true as this one. I love you and your kids...thanks for sharing and I am so glad that you are allowing your heart to heal.
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